First Date Conversation Topics

First dates can be exciting, nerve-wracking (usually both) and are always filled with possibility. 

There are some people we immediately click with, with whom conversation flows effortlessly and you never have to consider what to say. However, if chatter doesn't come entirely naturally with someone else it's not to say that they're wrong for you, or not worth making the effort to get to know. Once you've opened up a dialogue and started to get a sense of who they are, it can frequently be the case that any initial awkwardness was a total misconception.

We've put together some first date convo topics for those dating scenarios where you feel like you'll really get on with the person sitting across from you... if only you could think of something interesting to say.

1) How was your day?

It's basic but clichés are clichés for a reason. It's polite, easy to open with and holds the very real possibility of establishing immediate similarities/talking points between the two of you. By talking about your daily activities, you can learn about what they do for a living/for fun, and look for mutual connections between the two of you.

2) What is it that you like most about your job?

It's likely that you'll talk about work at some point anyway, so this is a good way of finding out what they do while also learning more about them as a person. Even if someone expresses that they don’t like their job, you can still ask them what they’d like to be doing instead and why.

3) What’s the scariest thing that ever happened to you? 

Hearing the sort of situation your date can get him/herself into is revealing about what they do with their time, and finding out how they handled themselves in a scary scenario gives you an insight into what makes them tick. It's also a good chance to empathise and engage with them, which can show them some of your good qualities too.

4) Where is the best place you’ve travelled to and why would you recommend it?

This allows a person to draw on memories of the place or share anecdotes about a trip, giving you a glimpse into their passions, interests and experiences - all of which are vital aspects of what makes someone who they are! It will make them more relaxed to talk about something they care about and are familiar with, AND you'll be able to tell if you're on the same page holiday-wise... Evidently a key factor if you're going to be marrying this person: if you're a cocktails-and-chill fan while they're dreaming about a Siberian mountain boot-camp for their next winter break you might want to find that out sooner rather than later.

5) Who in history would you most like to have a drink/coffee with (fictional or real)?

This is brilliant for telling you what someone's interested in and who inspires or entertains them. Will they answer the question seriously? And would they're drinking companion be someone powerful or wise or creative or compassionate? Or would they take a funny angle and choose someone witty who they'd have a laugh with? It's a question that reveals fun aspects of who someone is!

6) 6. Which movie(s) make you cry? 

If your date admits to weeping over Bambi or Titanic it indicates a certain softness of heart which is always pretty endearing. In fact, admitting to being moved to tears by any movie shows that they're not embarrassed to open up to you, even in this tiny way! Finding out someone's favourite films and why are always interesting questions too - whether they value the story, the actors, the cinematography... It can show what is important to them, AND, if you share any film-favourites, you can bond over quoting Harry Potter or Pulp Fiction to each other over dinner.

7) What were you like as a kid?

Another one that draws upon memories, although it can be a little overly personal for some people, so don't be too put off if they avoid this one. It can be surprising how much people change from their childhood, and sharing stories about your formative years can really help to connect you to someone and make you feel as if you've known each other longer than you have. It’s a nice one to give you a more well-rounded view of who they are.


8) What achievement are you most proud of?  

Obviously a little interview-like, but this can be a nice opportunity to find out what your date considers valuable, as well as brag a tiny tad about your own past victories if they reverse the question on you!

9) What are you looking for in a relationship? 

Yes this is maybe too personal for some, but it's important to know if you're on the same page. It goes in the direction of minimising misunderstandings and broken hearts in the future, and at least if you know straight away that this person doesn't want to date someone with kids (and you're rushing home for 4 to pick yours up from school) then you won't be wasting your time.